The Long Road to Here - Part 2 - Influence from My Parents
Posted: Friday, August 05, 2011
by Bruce Horst
WryteStuff
I started out writing this series guessing that there would be 8 parts to it. I believed it would be good for me to write about my journey for my own benefit, for posterity's sake, and to help my friends & family better understand how I've gotten to where I'm at today.
I've written about the influence I've had from my heritage in "The Long Road Here: My Influence from the Mennonites". What I hadn't really anticipated was how I was going to write about the influence I've had from my immediate family, particularly my parents and siblings.
My parents are wonderful people. They are literally known by people around the World for their graciousness and hospitality. When I was very young, they led our church youth group and they alway had something they could pull out of the closet that would keep anyone entertained.
My Dad had a thing for giant contraptions.
“I swear to you, I remember my brother reaching up and grabbing my foot when this kite caught a gust of wind, and then pulling me back down to earth.”
Then there was the family see-saw. My dad thought that if two people could be entertained by a seesaw made out of a 2x10 that was 8 feet long, then a seesaw that was 30 feet long could entertain a family of 7, especially when the see-saw raised to 12 feet in the air.
Water-ballon sling-shots, eight-legged races, the game of airplane and blow-the-penny-from-the-bowl. These were staples of entertaining kids and then telling them about The Kingdom, and my parents were the masters as far as I am concerned. I know that I received my love of hosting large parties from my parents. And I mean LARGE parties.
As a Mennonite, my dad was registered with the U.S. government as a conscientious objector. This meant he was opposed to war, even at the risk of his own life. He was a Christian-pacifist back when personal conviction meant you would go against popular demand when your beliefs dictated that you do so.
When my dad was drafted in the mid-1950's, he was sent to 1W service instead of the battlefield. He and his young family consisting of my mom and oldest sister and brother were sent to inner-city Baltimore Maryland to build up a community center called the 'McKim Community Center' for inner-city kids. Note the word 'community'. This community center exists today, as documented by Wikipedia.
After my parents were discharged from 1W service, one of the young girls that benefitted from the McKim community center became pregnant and asked my parents if they would adopt her baby. My parents agreed.
Two years later the sister of this girl also got pregnant and asked my parents if they would adopt her baby too, and my parents again agreed. The end result was that my parents had 2 biological children, a girl then a boy, then two adopted children, another girl and another boy. 5 years later, they had me. I'm "Bruce the caboose," the youngest of these 5 children.
My parents have had a lot of great accomplishments over the years. Still, I believe when history is written, their greatest accomplishments will be regarded as the amount of their lives that they poured into these two adopted children.
My adopted sister is like me in ways that none of my biological family is. She divorced after having three children, but yet she and her second husband probably have a relationship more like Jean and I have than any of my siblings and their spouses. I make sure to tell her husband every time I see him, "thank you for making sure my sister has a good life." And I mean it in a way that few understand.
My adopted brother is another story altogether. He's been in jail for most of the last 25 years. The amazing thing is that he's had opportunities to get out of jail, but he always sabotages these opportunities so that he remains confined in prison. People have asked why he can't be like me or my biological brother, but I don't think he really wants to be like us. He seems to be content living a very structured life. Since no one has been able to give him this in a normal life, he chooses to live his life behind bars. My theory as to why this is has to do with fetal alcohol syndrome, but that's another story.
The bottom line is that I've learned from my immediate family that people are different. And just because they are different, it doesn't mean they are wrong.
I've learned Christian-pacifism from my parents, and how to be generous and gracious. My mother is a very nurturing person, so I've learned that from her. The two of them have modeled a stable marriage for me and Jean, which is something we'll always appreciate.
Something that I should mention is that for a recent church conference, my parents were literally chosen as the 'poster children' for what a great marriage looks like. Here's an image of the poster they appeared in:
Ok, so they are not children. But they are my parents. And I'll always love them.
Thus concludes part 2 of 'The Long Road Here.' I can hardly wait to move beyond this part.
This Article has been viewed 787 times. (Not updated in real-time.)
Top-level comments on this article: (7 total)Bruce the caboose I can tell you're a big fan of Beck, Limbaugh and Hanity! Fetal alcohol syndrome--just taught about it--terrible thing to do a fetus. There are many people who like prison other than the outside where there are different risks and the unknown of being able to make it on your own...strange but it happens.
Your parents sound great and the 30 ft seesaw was funny. I am not a party lover and never have been and if I ever need a big one done just right I'll give you a call (ever been to Ohio?) Nonetheless, courageous story and thanks for sharing your self.
SteveAh, Steve. You and your early morning routine know me in a way that few others do! I'm not sure how that sentence got in there.
I think my brother could make it on the outside with the right structure, even with FAS. He's supposed to get out soon, but I'm not sure anyone else recognizes his need for structure.
I've been through Ohio many times, I'm not sure I ever stopped on the way through, though. What I'd really like to do is go out in your boat. Maybe someday.
I think this is a brave story, Bruce. It's true not many people dare or willing to expose the family skeleton. What we read or heard are mostly beautiful stories.
Sounds like a good son you are to your wonderful parents.
Very interesting story Bruce, thanks for sharing
Hi Bruce.
Sounds like your dad was the original "Tim 'the Tool Man' Taylor."
And you know, we all have skeletons in the family closet. Still, you are right, it isn't always easy exposing yours. Personally, I don't think your skeletons are too "scary." :)
Hugs,
Dianne
This is a very heart-warming and well-written piece. Thanks for this beautiful insight into your life Bruce.
I love the poster. Obviously, the right couple for the message. I agree with the above comments; that your story is interesting, well-written, heart-warming, and, I WILL look forward to the next installment.
Lovely article - nice to read an article where parents are praised
We want your comments! If you can read this, you don't have javascript enabled, so you can't use this comment system. Please enable javascript.